It's 10:00 and I'm brushing my teeth and hair getting ready for bed. I remake the bed over Jeremy (I can't sleep with crooked covers), and I realize the other pillow is missing! We have three. Two nice temprapedic hand me downs and one flimsy crappy one. I need two. I'm pregnant and comfort is a luxury I'm desperate to have. I've looked all over and I can't find it! I looked outside to make sure the dogs weren't playing a trick on me. It's not there. And it's not in our house!
Which means; someone came into our house and left Rosie's pillows and the two nice pillows, but decided to take the crappy pillow with the pillow case that matches our sheets. What a jerk(s)! How am I supposed to sleep?! The sciatica will kill me! I'm going to die tonight. Grrrrr! I am very angry. If anyone sees a flimsy pillow with a striped champagne colored pillow case IT'S MINE AND I NEED IT!

Walking group

So, I'm wanting to start a walking group. I certainly can not do aerobics in my current condition. Besides, church aerobics has ended. I'd like to start walking with people because walking alone is sooooooo boring! I do enjoy a nice walk. Maybe eventually it will branch into hiking once a month, who knows?

Groceries

Man! I went to the store today and spent $129.00 on basically nothing. That's too much money for us. Last week the same stuff (with the exception of very few things) was $80.00. The dog food should have made it $93.00 plus tax. When I saw that total go up I asked Lee, our cashier; "Umm are you sure? Did my rewards card go through? Do you have any coupons back there?" He laughed with me. What do you say? Never mind we don't need food this week? Ha Ha.

On the bright side: It's not the $400.00 a week my cousin pays for groceries. And, we don't pay $6.00 for a gallon of milk like my in-laws.

We just need help. We have friends who make less and live better. How do they do that? I think that's what baffles me the most. We just can't figure it out. We've gone to many professionals, one we really liked, but he didn't really want our business I'm guessing. He just dropped off the face of the earth.

A random sampling of Wednesday

Hmm...
This blog probably won't be a ray of sunshine. And will probably be missing many "U"s as my "U" button jams quite often.

Jayna's very sick today. She has had a fever since last night. Poor baby. I used all the medicine last night. Jerm took the car today, so there was no way to get any. Rosie was not a happy camper. Luckily, my Grandma Rose ran to the store for us and got both Tylenol and Motrin. Rosie finally ate around 11:30 and took medicine. She is now down for a nap in her big girl bed.

The Big Girl Bed; the transition from Pack n Play to BGB has been fairly smooth. Thank Goodness. Jayna's bed has got to be 100 times more comfy than the cardboard bottom of a Pack n Play. I'm sure Sam (our beagle) sleeping in her bed every night makes it worth while too.

My house is a disaster. Like most people, I don't enjoy cleaning. But, for some reason I think it'd be easier to clean a place you like. For example, usually when some one's moved, after the boxes are unpacked their house is pretty neat. Because it's new and they want to keep it nice. I have no desire to keep this place nice. Even when it's tidy it looks horrible. That's what we get I guess. I'm trying desperately to think of all the lessons I need to learn by being here. To the best of my knowledge I've learnt them. Jeremy doesn't seem to want to move even if we could afford it. Talk about frustrating. Not that it matters we can't afford it. Besides, who'd feed the mice? It also doesn't help that I was up till 2:30 in the morning with a sick toddler. Nor, does it help when said toddler is so clingy you can't even pee. Let alone pick up or do dishes or laundry.

I want to take a bath. I never get to. During nap time I'm usually trying to accomplish some organizational task that nearly always goes unnoticed. After daddy gets home he gets in the tub, then dinner, then Rosie tub time, the family Scripture/prayer, then I usually put away dinner, then I try to talk to my Dear Husband (which usually means we're both on-line doing totally separate things.), Tuesday or Wednesday forget it because American Idol is on. After all of that, I end up bathing on Saturday around 10:00 at night weather I need it or not.

I have officially converted to pessimism. I fought a valiant fight against it to no avail. I have been married for almost three years and we have struggled (financially) the entire time. Eventually when your doing everything within you power, and asking God to do everything within his, you just give up. If I had finished my degree we wouldn't be having ANY of these issues. I'd be working less and making more than my DH while still being home during the day. I know I need to finish, but the money doesn't exist. The tuition isn't bad, but the child care and books would be phenomenal. I looked into every option I can think of. We wouldn't qualify for a student loan, and grants wouldn't cover all of it. So, we continue to be screwed, in a dump, dirty, with a sick kid, who sleeps in a big girl bed.